Throughout the years I have celebrated many birthdays. When I was a kid, I loved this day as I was
getting all the attention, I used to organize big parties, invite everybody; getting lots of presents. All
this commotion and the love and care of my parents made me feel like a real Princess.
As I was growing older, the way I celebrated my birthday started to change a little bit. I wanted to
add more “flavor” to it by doing something out of the ordinary so I start my personal year with a thrill
and a sense of novelty. For instance, 2 years ago I accepted the invitation of my friend and went to
visit her in Geneva. A weekend in Switzerland is not a bad idea, even in February. We got to eat
fondue and drink some wine, we visited a fascinating museum of watches (after all, everybody is
aware of the Swiss reputation in the matter). And just like that, one of the evenings we decided to go
for ski on the next day in France. She invited her friends and we had a blast there. Well, as I said – I
wanted to add more flavor to the day, so a “near death” experience fit quite well in the description
(but let me tell you this story some other time).
Nowadays, I still want to have a big party, invite many people, and celebrate new experiences. Yet, I
realized that what makes me happy are the people I am with – even if it is with a small group, if it is
with the right ones – it is the right one.
15.02.2020 – a very special birthday
Birthday is always an emotional moment as you reflect on the past year, see where you have reached
and with whom you are surrounded. Sometimes we could feel that our life situation is fortunate,
other times we might feel that something is still missing or we would like it to be different. No matter
how we feel, on this day there is usually a hope in the air, a desire, an expectation for the future
This was true for me too. I had big plans – I wanted to organize a picnic in the park if the weather is good (in Brittany you never know), to cook Bulgarian food and to go dance the night away. Even though I couldn’t be with my family and close old friends, I was fortunate to have found a great group of people I became good friends with. I was also excited about this day as I could spend it with another special person I was seeing for couple of months.
Still…things do not often go as we plan.
Couple of days prior my birthday, out of the blue for me, we separated…
This is why this birthday was particularly emotional for me due to being away from home and due to
the recent events. I felt shocked, devastated and alone.
In a way, I didn’t have anymore will to organize anything, smile and pretend to be happy.
At the end, although I was sad, I decided to take the maximum of the day. After all, My Day is coming
once a year and it is worth honoring! I decided to enjoy, create good memories and treat myself the
way I deserve. And I have to admit – it feels great to reward yourself, your body and spirit by eating
something delicious, drinking a good cup of coffee, buying beautiful clothes and getting ready to
welcome the night celebration.
In the evening, I was ready to rock the party and have the time of my life.
Nevertheless, I have to confess that this was not going to be possible without friends…
I had invited them in my student campus in the common kitchen where I prepared a Shopska salad
(Bulgarian salad), lukanka (Bulgarian sausage), some snacks and drinks.
The more people were coming, the more the party spirit and my mood were lifting up. They came to
congratulate me and wished me amazing things.
The music was on, everybody was having fun, trying different food, giving “Cheers” and…making
photos! It was so funny as we had a “dedicated” wall where everybody took turn to make all sorts of photos, faces and show their craziness.
Being there with this group of people was priceless.
I was very touched by the wonderful wishes they made me because they seemed to be personalized
and coming from the heart.
I also found it very interesting how at one moment during the party someone of them would come to me and share their impressions of me. They had no idea what had happened to me or how I really felt inside, but what they told me, what they shared with me, were words so precise, as if answering questions and insecurities raging in my soul.
Then I realized – I found myself surrounded by wonderful people, real friends who made my birthday unforgettable! I felt their love and care and I knew I was not alone!
What did I learn from this birthday?
Life sends us challenges to test us and make us stronger. But it also send us a kind smile and creates
unexpected twists and turns (of events) to give us new opportunities and hope!
During the last years I have learnt to say more often “Thank you”, “I am sorry”, “I love you”. I have
allowed myself to lower my guard, show my feelings, be more open and vulnerable.
I try to expect less and to enjoy more.
What will happen tomorrow? I do not know.
What do I expect, what do I plan? – I understood that I should not expect anything and should not
lock myself within the frame of a detailed plan. Not to limit my journey to an only one possible path.
But to have clear objectives I am aiming at, yet, to leave myself to the creativity and mystery of life
about how to get there.